trust Archives - Sharla Fritz

3 Positive Side-Effects of Giving Up Grumbling

Sharla October 6, 2020

Grumbling seems to be a national pastime. We moan when the weather is lousy. We complain about traffic. We gripe about disappointments.

Why do we do this?

Maybe it’s because complaining garners sympathy. Maybe it’s because it feels good to get something off your chest. Maybe it’s because it’s easy conversation–usually everyone else joins in with their own gripes.

Maybe it’s because you’re like me and you think: If I don’t complain, what will I talk about?

We Know We Should Give Up Grumbling

But even though it’s easy to grumble, we all know we should give it up.

The apostle Paul wrote:

Do everything without complaining or arguing.
Philippians 2:14

That pretty much covers it, doesn’t it? God commands us to do everything without grumbling.

Gulp.

Fortunately, for those of us who need a little extra incentive, Paul tells us there are positive side-effects to ending our griping sessions. Look at the next verse in Philippians:

“So that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe” Philippians 2:15

Three Positive Side-Effects to Giving Up Grumbling

Paul told the Philippians that there are three positive side-effects to giving up griping:

We will become blameless and pure. Blameless means without fault. When we give up complaining, our lives will not be open to criticism. Pure means our lives will not be a mixture of good and evil. When I use my imagination to see myself through God’s eyes when I’m complaining, I see someone given who has been given the greatest gifts of salvation and life forever in heaven and still complains about the weather. A mixture of good and evil. Without my constant griping, my life is a better reflection of Christ’s purity.
We will be children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation. When we’re complaining we look just like everyone else. If give up our griping we will stand out in a society without faith, without hope. People will recognize we have something special. A friend of mine who became a Christian as an adult said that before she knew Jesus, she didn’t see any benefits to becoming a Christian. She thought Christianity was just following a bunch of rules. She saw that Christians still had problems. She couldn’t figure out why someone would subject themselves to all those rules if they didn’t get any benefits. When things don’t go our way, we have an opportunity to show non-Christians the benefits of being a child of God. Even though we have problems, we also have a Father who goes through them with us. Do our lives demonstrate that truth when we are complaining?
We will shine like stars in the universe. Without complaining, our light will shine brighter, we will be more able to point people to the Light of the world. Complaining will only dim our brightness.

Give Up Grumbling, Exhibit Trust

When we abandon the habit of complaining every time something irritates us or someone disappoints us, we can shine a light on the One who is more than willing to give us the grace to face every trial. When we give up grumbling, we exhibit trust in the God who will hold our hand through every rainy day, every bump in the road, every painful disappointment.

Why Are You So Afraid?: Two Kinds of Fear

Sharla March 10, 2020

On a windy day on a lake, Jesus asked His disciples, “Why are you so afraid?” As the wind pummeled their small boat, Jesus confronted their fears.

This story came alive to me recently when my husband and I traveled to Israel. This trip had been on my bucket list for years. I longed to walk in the footsteps of Jesus and see the land God’s people called home for centuries.

On the third day of our trip, our tour group spent some time in a boat on the Sea of Galilee. It was the end of the day and the sky began filling with clouds. But beams of sunlight filtered through, shining God’s glory.

The Sea of Galilee and Mount Arbel from our boat.

Jesus on the Sea of Galilee

While gazing at the beauty of the sky, the lake, and the surrounding mountains, our tour guide read us Mark 4:35-41:

On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side.” And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, “Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. He said to them, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?” And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?”

God dramatically punctuated the word “windstorm” with a great gust of wind that shook our boat for a minute. Our guide told us that because the Sea of Galilee is surrounded by mountains, winds can whip up suddenly and unexpectedly. That’s exactly what happened the day the disciples were in the boat with a sleepy Savior. They thought He didn’t care about them and woke Him up.

Jesus immediately took care of the situation by calming the sea, then asked His trembling disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?”

Two Kinds of Fear

The story of Jesus and the disciples on the Sea of Galilee talks about two kinds of fear.

Deilos Fear. Fear comes naturally to us humans. The word for afraid in Jesus’ question, “Why are you so afraid?” (Mark 4:40) is deilos–meaning timid or fearful. While we may not be on a sinking boat, our world gives us many reasons to have fear. We fear sinking financial failure and not being able to pay the bills at the end of the month. We fear storms of relationship troubles and clouds of deadly viruses.

Or maybe your fears are a little more subtle. Even if you don’t see monsoons of disaster in the skies of your life right now, you may harbor secret fears of loneliness, fears of growing old. Maybe you hide fears of failure, fears of the future.

But just like Jesus asked His disciples, He asks us, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?”

Phobeo Fear. The second word for fear in the story of the disciples in the boat comes in verse 41: “And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, ‘Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?’” (emphasis added). Here the Greek word is phobeo, which can mean to be afraid, but also can indicate reverence. The disciples were in awe of Jesus’ ability to calm the wind and the sea.

Instead of deilos fear, let’s have phobeo fear. If Jesus can calm waves on the Sea of Galilee, certainly He can quiet the fears in my heart and your heart. When we focus more on awe of the God who can handle any situation instead of our timid hearts, God will erase our fears. The sunshine of His grace will filter through the dark clouds of our anxiety.

My husband John and me on the Sea of Galilee.

Why Are You So Afraid?

If fear has taken up residence in your heart today, listen to Jesus’ question, “Why are you so afraid?” Examine the source of your fear: finances? relationships? health? Then consider Jesus’ second question, “Have you still no faith?” Do you believe that Jesus’ power and strength can overcome any financial, relationship, or health problem? Can you trust that even though He may not remove the problem that He will walk through it with you? Then why fear? Focus on the ever-present, all-powerful God who says, “Peace be still!” to the raging anxiety in your heart.

Next step: Read Mark 4:35-41 once again. Picture yourself in the boat with Jesus. What would you have felt that day in the boat? How does Jesus’ ability to calm the sea affect you? How does it change your perspective of your current-day fears?

Three Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was Waiting

Sharla March 29, 2016

Are you sitting in one of life’s waiting rooms?

Waiting for Mr. Right? For a child? For a new job?

I’ve been there too. And I have to admit, I didn’t wait well.

I complained. I griped. I made sure God knew that I didn’t like the way things were going.

But I’ve been learning a bit about waiting lately. And what I’ve discovered is that although we may hate waiting–God can use the pause in our plans for our good.

This past week I read Psalm 130. I love these verses:

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
    and in his word I hope;
my soul waits for the Lord
    more than watchmen for the morning,
    more than watchmen for the morning. (verses 5-6)

To dig into this passage a little deeper, I looked up the word wait in the Hebrew dictionary. The word translated “wait” in the ESV is from the Hebrew word qavah. This Hebrew word has several meanings–and teaches three things about waiting that I wish I had known when I was in experiencing a serious delay in my plans.

Three Lessons About Waiting from the Hebrew Word Qavah

To wait is to look eagerly for. The first meaning for qavah emphasizes how we are to wait–with eagerness and certainty. In verse 6 of Psalm 130 the psalmist compares the waiting of his soul to the waiting of the night watchman. The gloom of the night may seem long to the watchman, but he is sure of one thing–morning will come. While he is watching, he is certain there is an end to the wait.

Though our lives may seem terribly black at times, we can also be sure that God is always there for us. He is always working things out for our good. We can eagerly look for His solution to our problems.

To wait is to linger. The second meaning stresses a positive side of waiting. Usually waiting has a negative connotation. We hate waiting at the checkout line. Or for our food at Olive Garden. Or for someone to answer the phone after we’ve been on hold for 20 minutes!

But to linger is a contented way to wait. We linger over the last few drops of coffee with a friend–waiting just a few more minutes before we have to part. We linger in the sunshine at the beach–waiting a moment longer before going back to the noise of the world.

God invites us to view a season of waiting as a time to linger in His presence. Time to hang out with Him a few more hours. Time to linger in His love and peace.

God invites us to view a season of waiting as a time to linger in His presence. Share on X

To wait is to collect or bind together. The third definition of the Hebrew word is a meaning we don’t have for our English word wait. Qavah can mean “to bind together.” Waiting is hard. But it can be a time to grow closer to God–a time to connect with Him like never before. Think about it. When do you feel closest to God? When all your plans are moving along smoothly? Or when you are desperately wanting God to answer your prayers?

I have to admit–I spend a lot more time on my knees when life throws me a crisis and God isn’t fixing it as quickly as I would like. As I wait, God often reveals Himself to me in a way I haven’t experienced before. He shows me deep truths in His Word. He demonstrates His unfailing love in unexpected ways.

Are you experiencing a serious pause in your plans? Grab onto these three lessons while you’re waiting.

Look eagerly for God in your situation–expect Him to come through.

Linger in His presence.

Use the time of delay to grow closer to God.

Next step: Write out Psalm 130:5-6 on a note card or sticky note. Add the definition of qavah that speaks to you today. Post the note where you will see it often this week.

The Key to Unlock the Chains of “Doing”

Sharla March 22, 2016

“What did you do today?”

It’s an innocent question. One I usually like to answer. One I often use to get a conversation going.

It’s even a question I often ask myself.

I’m a doer. You too? We doers like to accomplish things. We make massive to-do lists and find glee in placing little check marks next to completed jobs. (Sometimes we even write down tasks we’ve finished that weren’t on the list just so we can make that satisfying check mark.)

But this week while I was reading and meditating on the psalms, God spoke to me about all my “doing.”

I was reading Psalm 118:5:

In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and he answered by setting me free.

And the Holy Spirit highlighted the phrase “setting me free.” The phrase unsettled my soul. But I couldn’t figure out why.

The phrase conjured up images of chains falling off swollen wrists. Of bursting out of a dark dungeon into blinding sunshine. Of running through a swaying field of flowers.

I asked God why my heart needed to hear that particular phrase.

And the answer was that I have been bound to the chains of “doing.” Being a doer is not a bad thing. But it can get in the way of being a child of God if I am basing my value on my accomplishments. If I’m focusing on what I can do. If I view myself as worthless when my efforts don’t get the results I would like.

In that simple little phrase, “setting me free,” the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart: What if instead of focusing on what you have done, instead of staring at what you haven’t done (ahem where I’ve failed), you began to concentrate on what God has done?

Later in Psalm 118 there is another phrase that grabbed my heart: “proclaim what the Lord has done” (verse 17).

In fact, Psalm 118 is full of things the Lord has done: He has

loved me forever (verse 1)
set me free (verse 5)
helped me (verse 7)
protected me (verse 8)
done mighty things (verse 16)

And when I look back on the past few weeks of my life, I see that He has:

given my husband a good health report–no cancer!
helped me recover from a bad cold
given me time with my daughter and her family
granted me a new book contract

When I focus on “what the Lord has done” the chains of doing and the pressure of accomplishing fall away.

I am set free.

Next step: What has the Lord done for you this week? Make a list. And as you focus on what God has done, feel the pressure of accomplishment fall away.

Directions to the Perfect Way

Sharla February 23, 2016

When my husband is driving, I ~~sometimes~~ often need to resist the urge to give directions. You see, I want to say things like:

You’ll want to turn left here.

It’s better if you avoid that road.

You’re going that way?

And it’s all because I think my way is better.

Now, over the years my tendency to be a back-seat driver has slightly diminished because I have realized something:

My husband knows the way.

I have often struggled with being a backseat driver in my life as well. I know God is supposed to be the One steering me through the course of life, but I want to be the one in charge.

As I have been reading through the psalms, God continually reminds me that He knows the way. The best way.

Psalm 18 says:

As for God, his way is perfect:
The Lord’s word is flawless;
he shields all who take refuge in him. (Psalm 18:30)

David tells me that God’s way is perfect. The Hebrew word for way is derek which means road, journey, path, or course of life. And the word perfect in Hebrew means complete and whole. It is used often in the Old Testament to describe the animals that were to be brought for sacrifice in the temple–without blemish.

God’s path or road through life is complete.

It isn’t deficient or lacking.

It is not defective or flawed.

Although the world continually tries to get me to follow current trends and popular advice, it usually doesn’t take me long to discover those ways are inadequate.

Only God’s way is perfect. In other words, if I follow God’s directions, I will always be on the right road.

David takes this idea of God’s perfect path a step further in verse 32:

It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. (Psalm 18:32)

This makes things a little more personal. It might be fairly easy for me to agree with the fact that God’s way is perfect–for other people.

But to believe that God makes my way perfect means I have to stop giving the directions and be willing to take them. It means I have to admit:

My way is flawed

My way is deficient

My way is not perfect.

Not very easy for this recovering control freak.

But God invites me to take His hand while He guides me on the path He has designed and trust that it truly is perfect for me.

God invites me to take His hand and trust that the path He has designed is truly perfect for me. Share on X

In His love, the Father has laid out a road that brings me closer to Him.

In His wisdom He has found the best lane to travel in.

In His power He enables me to follow the route He has planned.

Background information: Psalm 18 is a personal psalm of praise. It was written by David, a “servant of the Lord.” David instructed the choirmaster to use this song to the Lord on the day when the Lord rescued him form the hand of his enemies–especially Saul. If you would like to join me in reading through the psalms during this Lenten season, download this free reading guide.

Next step: Pray with me, “Lord, forgive me when I have doubted that Your way is perfect. When I have insisted on a path of my own choosing, no matter how flawed or incomplete it was. Help me to wholeheartedly believe that You are guiding me on the best possible path to a fulfilling life. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

When Your Life Takes a Plot Twist

Sharla September 29, 2015

This week I’m privileged to be featured on the incourage site. If you’re not familiar with this site you might want to sign up to get their posts–wonderful, encouraging stuff every day!

I love a good story. I like getting lost in a fictional world filled with interesting characters and an intriguing plot. Give me romance and mystery. Provide me with adventure and astonishing developments in the storyline.

In my own life, however, I greatly prefer a predictable plot. I would like my life to have the pace of a well-crafted story of my own choosing. No unexpected plot twists for me, please. Just pleasant days filled with laughter and friends. Years of successful work and close family ties.

Unfortunately real life isn’t like that. The plot that I planned out for my time on earth simply hasn’t materialized. Every chapter has had surprise twists. Events I expected to happen never did. Things I said I would not do under any circumstances became the very things God asked me to embrace.

Recently life delivered an unexpected development in my life tale.

My husband has been diagnosed with lymphoma….

To continue reading, click here to head over to (in)courage

When You’re In the Waiting Room of Life

Sharla September 22, 2015

Are you in a season of waiting?

One of my friends feels like she is in a state of limbo right now. She and her husband are considering moving away from cold Illinois winters to a warmer climate. But because they have not yet made the decision to move to a new location, my friend also feels like she can’t move forward in life. Should she avoid getting involved in activities here because they will be moving soon? Or should she dive into new experiences because they are staying?

The waiting room of life is an uncomfortable spot. As we sit, waiting for a door to open to our next phase of life, we wonder, “What now?” and “What next?”

And just like in a doctor’s waiting room, when we are forced to wait we are at a loss of what to do. How many times can you read the same 6-month-old Golf Digest magazine? How many times can you pray the same prayer for direction?

One of the verses I hang onto when I’m in the waiting room of life is Psalm 5:3:

In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice, in the morning I lay my request before you and wait in expectation.

I love the last phrase, “Wait in expectation.” When we’re waiting on God we can expect Him to do something wonderful. He promises you that He has “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). He assures you and me that He can rearrange all our rotten circumstances because He “works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28).

The problem comes when I place my expectations in something other than God. I get in trouble when I expect life to be free of disappointment. Jesus told us to expect life problems, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33). I will often be disillusioned when I expect people to fill all my needs.

So when I’m in the waiting room of life I need to go back to God. Like the psalmist, I need to bring my request every morning, trusting that He will hear my voice. I need to hang onto His promises. I need to believe in His goodness.When I'm in the waiting room of life, I need to hang onto God's promises and trust in His goodness. Share on X

And then I need to wait in expectation. Hang onto His promised plan. Trust in His amazing love. Relax in His enveloping peace.

Wait in expectation.

Great Expectations: What to Do When Life Disappoints

Sharla June 23, 2015

We expect great things out of life. But often life disappoints us.

A while back, my husband and I were scrolling through Netflix, trying to find something to watch. I spied a movie with a plotline described as, “An accomplished pianist’s life takes a terrible turn. An aimless college student becomes her caregiver and the two form a bond that enriches both their lives.”

The movie had me at “accomplished pianist.” As a pianist myself, I’m drawn to stories about musicians. This movie sounded perfect.

The only problem was the movie wasn’t really about a musician. The main character only played the piano once. Music never had a major role in the plot. I was disappointed.

The movie did not live up to my expectations.

Life is Full of Disappointment

Life is like that too, right? I mean, most of us have experienced disappointments, setbacks, even tragedies that we did not expect. All our hopes and dreams become like deflated balloons that sink from the ceiling and lay around on the floor.

And if we’re not careful, our joy and trust can burst and disappear.

I think the problem is when we put our hopes and expectations in the wrong things. We expect life to treat us well. If you live in America, the land based on the “pursuit of happiness,” you expect your life to improve, to get better every day.

However, Jesus told us if that is our view of life, it will not live up to our expectations. He said, “In the world you will have tribulation” (John 16:33). Living in this sin-sickened world, we really can’t assume we’ll have a perfect life. Instead we can expect pain, sickness, and stinking problems.

Someone Worthy of My Expectations

This sounds pretty grim until I realize that there is Someone worthy of my expectations. God has promised to never leave me, never forsake me. He is faithful. He is loving. He is good. While my life here won’t be perfect, I can expect God to always come through when I need Him. I can trust that He has a fantastic plan for my life.

John 3:14-15 (MSG) says:

In the same way that Moses lifted the serpent in the desert so people could have something to see and then believe, it is necessary for the Son of Man to be lifted up—and everyone who looks up to him, trusting and expectant, will gain a real life, eternal life.

Look to Jesus–trusting and expectant–and your life will be real. Maybe it won’t be the life you had planned. Perhaps it won’t be the life you had carefully arranged. Maybe it won’t be the life you had shaped in your mind. But trusting in the God who loves you more than you know will give the life you were meant for.

Life won’t live up to our expectations. But God will never let us down.

Next step: What do you do when life disappoints? Is there a part of your life that is not living up to your expectations right now? Write it on a piece of paper and offer it to God in prayer. Ask Him to help you let it go. Pray that He will help you trust Him for the most awesome life possible.

When You Feel Like You’re Straining Against the Wind

Sharla April 28, 2015

Where to look when you feel like you're straining against the oars.

“He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them.” Mark 6:48

Do you ever feel like you’re straining against the wind?

This month, I’m reading through the Gospel of Mark and when I got to chapter six, I immediately identified with the disciples in the boat. Gale force winds of cancer have blown into our lives with my husband’s lymphoma diagnosis. In my professional life, I sometimes feel like I’m frantically rowing, but not getting anywhere. Winds of loneliness and despair occasionally blow my way.

Perhaps you feel the same way. Financial tornadoes may be blowing into your life. You are constantly straining against chronic health problems. Relationship difficulties threaten to blow you down again and again.

Thankfully, Jesus didn’t leave the disciples straining at the oars on their own. He came to them miraculously walking on the water. He came to them comforting them with the words, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid” (Mark 6:50). Jesus speaks to our fears, our worries, our lack of courage with assurance He is with us. He is able to overcome the worst.

Life often feels like one big struggle against the wind. What we can learn from Jesus' disciples in Mark 6.

Learning From the Disciples’ Experience

What can we learn from the disciples’ experience?

We may experience a time of waiting. Although Jesus saw the disciples straining at the oars in the evening He waited until 3:00 in the morning to come to them. We don’t know why Jesus waited to help the disciples. And we don’t know why we sometimes experience long waiting times for healing, for help, for hope. But we can take comfort in realizing Jesus sees us straining at the oars. He knows firsthand the struggle against this world.

We sometimes don’t recognize Jesus in the struggle. When the disciples first saw a figure walking toward them on the water, they didn’t recognize it was Jesus. Mark’s account tells us that even after witnessing Jesus feeding a crowd of 5000+ with a couple of fish and a few loaves of bread, their hearts were hardened. They didn’t recognize Jesus on the water, because they didn’t recognize Him as God. We too may be so focused on the winds, on our struggle, on our own efforts, that we don’t recognize Jesus in the storm. Jesus promised us that He would never leave us. Ask Him to give you eyes to recognize Him. To believe that He is able to help. To recognize His aid may come in a totally unexpected way.

We can find comfort in Jesus’ words, “Take courage. It is I. Don’t be afraid.” The disciples had to wait for Jesus physical presence. But now He is always with us. He promises to be there with us in the struggle. The wind of trouble may not die down immediately like it did for the disciples, but we know Jesus will be there in the boat with us. When the waves appear to swamp our boat, we know that Christ is still in control.

Next step: When you feel like you’re straining against the wind, wait for the answer. Recognize it may come in an unexpected way. Remember Jesus is in the boat with you.

original photo source

When You Can’t Do It By Yourself

Sharla March 24, 2015

Every week people pass through my living room and take a turn sitting at my grand piano. I give them my undivided attention for thirty to sixty minutes while they play music by Mozart and Beethoven and Gershwin. I help them make sense of fingering and eighth notes and terms like sforzando.

And I love it. Teaching piano is a joy.

This year I have three very young beginners. One girl who is only five herself comes with her mother and a little two-year old sister. While the older sister is having her piano lesson the little sister sits on the sofa while her mother tries to keep her occupied with storybooks and playing games on an iPad.

A couple of weeks ago the little sister was becoming very frustrated–making so much noise that it distracted my student. The mother explained, “She wants to play the game herself, but it’s hard so she gets frustrated when she can’t do it. But she gets angry when I try to to help.”

I had to laugh. Because this is exactly how I am with God.

I want to do stuff. I want to make a difference. I want to accomplish big things. So I work and work and sometimes it’s hard. I get frustrated because I cant’ do it. But do I go to God for help? Not….always. Instead, I act like a two-year-old and get angry when I can’t do it by myself.

Which is silly because trying to do something in my power without accessing the power of God is a little like trying to grate a pound of carrots by hand when all along I have an amazing food processor in my cupboard.

Ephesians 3:20 says:

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

God is able to accomplish infinitely more than we can imagine through his mighty power. Not through my genius. Not through my strength. Not through my determination.

So what does it look like to accomplish much in His mighty power?

Maybe it means stopping before I work to ask for His help.

Maybe it means admitting I need His assistance.

Maybe it means thanking Him that I don’t have to do it on my own.

Whew. I feel better already.

Next step: What would it look like in your life to work in God’s power instead of your own?Post Ephesians 3:20 where you will see it today.