Spiritual Growth Archives - Page 6 of 13 - Sharla Fritz

Spring Cleaning: Let’s Throw Out Expectations

Spring Cleaning-ExpectationsPIN 

Expectations.

I have a bunch of clothes in my closet that I should throw out because they have failed to live up to my expectations.

  • the “slim-secret” jeans that actually reveal every secret of my figure
  • the jacket that I thought would coordinate with so many outfits, but I have yet to find a single item it matches

Expectations.
Maybe it would be good to just throw them out all together.

Spring Cleaning-Expectations

When I graduated from college with a music degree, I expected to have a bevy of piano students knocking at my door. I assumed I would have an abundance of pupils excelling in music-making.

And even though I married to a pastor, I did not expect to be the church organist. In fact, I told God I would never become a church organist.

However, my husband’s first church was in Missoula, Montana–a beautiful town that an abundance of fine piano teachers and a church (our church) that had no organist. And so my music degree was put to work on the organ.

Life was not turning out as I expected.

The trouble with expectations is that they set you up for disappointment. Just when I think the thing I most want is in my grasp, it falls away. Just when the vision I want for my life begins to focus, it all fades to black.

But even when our expectations have let us down, it doesn’t mean there is no hope.

It just means that we have put our hope in the wrong thing. 

The psalmist Asaph had to talk to his soul when he was discouraged. Perhaps his expectations had been crushed. He said:

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.
Psalm 42:5

When I put my hope in specific happenings, I may be disappointed.

But if I put my hope and expectations in God, I am never disillusioned. Things may not go as I have planned, but God has bigger and better things in mind.
I had certain expectations for my career. I expected happiness and fulfillment to come through piano teaching.

I hated playing the organ and fulling assumed that I would be miserable sitting on the organ bench Sunday after Sunday.
But it turned out that I found joy in using my musical training to praise God. My expectations for my career were not fulfilled, but my joy in God was.

Expectations.

Let’s throw them out. Let’s not assume our lives will go according to our plans. Life is unpredictable.

Let’s release the belief that happiness and joy are only available when our expectations are met.

Instead, let’s put our hope in God. Let’s expect that God has something wonderful for us just around the corner.  

Next step: What expectations for your life have you been clinging to? Write a prayer giving them to God and praising Him that He has something wonderful planned for your life.

Being or Doing

being or doing

“Turn left. At a quarter of a mile turn right.” When my husband and I get in the car at our home in the Chicago area to visit relatives in Missouri, we plug in our GPS device and get directions for every turn. And turn we do, left and right and left again…until we get to I-55. Once we are on this highway we don’t hear the voice of the GPS lady for hours. Why? Because we simply need to follow the interstate road for 160 miles. No turns necessary.

Sometimes I wish there were more turns in the road. That stretch of I-55 is not particularly awe-inspiring—just miles and miles of flat Illinois farmland. Miles and miles of corn and soybean fields. I wish for something more exciting.

There have been times in my life when I have felt like I’m on a not-so-awe-inspiring road. Life is moving along, but it seems like nothing much is happening. And I pray, “God, am I going the right direction? I feel like I haven’t heard much from You lately. Could you give a little more direction? Throw in a little excitement?”

Today I’m over at the Mudroom Blog. Click here to read on…

being or doingPIN

Spring Cleaning: Let’s Throw Out Comparison

ThrowOutComparison 

Spring is here–at least according to the calendar. So it’s time to do a little spring cleaning.

For me, spring cleaning involves vacuuming under the furniture (It’s amazing how much dust can accumulate under beds and behind desks!) And doing jobs I tend to neglect. (The other day I hit a lampshade with the vacuum and the shade changed from gray to white!)

My spring cleaning ritual also involves sorting out my closet. It’s time to get out my spring and summer clothes and store the bulky winter items. Time to reassess my wardrobe and toss out the clothes that aren’t working for me anymore.

But let’s not stop with spring cleaning our homes and closets–let’s do a little spring cleaning of the heart. It’s time to toss out things we thought would fit us and make us feel good, but actually make us uncomfortable and miserable.

ThrowOutComparison2

First on the list–comparison. 

If Comparison 101 were offered as a college course, most of us women would have no trouble earning an A+ in that class.

We tend to compare our figures and our hair. We measure up our homes and decor. We look at our friends’ purses, cell phones, shoes, jewelry…and wonder if ours are as good.

But comparison rarely leads to anything positive. It may lead to pride if today’s comparison makes me feel a little better than someone else.

Or it may lead to feeling like a failure if in my current comparison I am not as thin or beautiful or successful or…

Comparison seems like a natural fit, but it always chafes and irritates our hearts. It’s time to throw it out.

Read God’s Word:

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:10

When I read that I hear God whispering:

Don’t compare yourself to others, because I purposely made you just as you are. 

I put you together with careful craftsmanship and intentional quality. 

Don’t second-guess Me and wonder why I didn’t make you more like “her.” 

I love you exactly as you are.

It’s time to throw out comparison. Accept yourself as God’s workmanship.

Next step: Read the words of Psalm 139:10. Turn them into a prayer that you repeat whenever you’re tempted to compare yourself to someone else today.

7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Word of the Year

7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Word of the Year

I love new beginnings. They motivate me to start new habits and learn new things. That’s why at the beginning of a new year I pick a word to guide the next twelve months. One word to inspire the next 52 weeks. One word to direct the next 365 days.

I used to make a long list of resolutions on New Year’s Eve. Lose 10 pounds. Exercise 5 times a week. Organize all closets. But most of the time, the resolutions I made on January 1 were all but forgotten by January 31.

Choosing one word has been more successful. Instead of ten or twenty resolutions to remember, it’s only one word. Plus I find it helpful to have a single focus for the year. There are dozens of things I want to accomplish, hundreds of things I want to learn, a myriad of ways I hope to grow in my Christian faith, but I find I can’t do it all at the same time. Choosing one word gives me one area to focus on during the year. By the end of those twelve months, I hope that one thing will seep into my soul and that God will work that characteristic into my heart.

However, sometimes my word of the year has met the same fate as my old resolutions–forgotten. I have picked a word in January and promptly forgotten it by February.

But a few years ago, I decided to do things differently and be more proactive in using and studying my chosen word. That year I chose the word abide, but besides simply choosing that word, I purposely set out to know what abide meant. I meditated on the word and asked God to teach me and change me. I searched through Scripture and delved into Greek and English meanings.

7 Ways to Make the Most of Yourof the YearPIN

If you would like to get more out of your one word this year, here are a few suggestions:

  1. Make your word visible. I made a mini-poster of the word abide using a photo I found online. I used the photo-editing site Canva to add the word to the photo. I then printed the mini-poster and hung it near my computer where I would see it often. Here is my mini-poster.Copy of abide
  2. Find Scriptures. I did a word search on Bible Gateway (an incredibly helpful online Bible) and found Scriptures that contained the word abide. I picked one verse as a “theme verse” for the year: I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5
  3. Memorize verses with your chosen word. I also decided to memorize a few verses with the word or concept of abide. Regularly reviewing these verses imprinted them on my soul. Meditating on them opened up my heart to listen to what the Holy Spirit had to teach me about abiding. Even if you don’t like memorizing, you can obtain the same effect by posting verses with your one word on your bathroom mirror or your refrigerator. Every time you see the Scriptures, read them and remember.
  4. Discover the meaning of your word. To really understand the word abide, I looked up the meaning of the word on Dictionary.com. I also got more insights into the word by looking up the Greek word translated as abide in the New Testament on the site Blue Letter Bible. You can find out what I learned about abide here and here.

To receive three more ways to get more out of your one word this year, check out my 7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Word of the Year Workbook. Click the button below to view and download. You will not only gain access to more suggestions but a helpful ten-page workbook that outlines all seven methods. It gives you space to study your word and room to record your insights. 

Next step: Start with this prayer: Lord Jesus, work in my heart. Open my mind to what You want to work in my soul this year. Help me to choose a word that will guide me on the path You want me to walk. Teach me and transform me in the coming months. In Your name I pray, Amen.

3 Ways Abiding in Christ Can Change Your Life: Connecting

Copy of abide

Abiding in Christ.

Every year I choose one word to focus on. One word to guide the next twelve months.

At the beginning of 2017, I chose “abide.” I hoped that studying and meditating on that word would help me understand it better. I kept asking, “What does that word mean, exactly?” “How do I abide?” “How does abiding help my relationship with Jesus?” “How can it affect my daily life?”

Although I am still learning, still growing, I am going to share what I have learned so far. I am going to tell three ways abiding in Christ changed my life. This post will concentrate on connecting.

When I began the study of abiding, one of the things I did was to memorize verses with the word “abide.” The first verse I memorized was John 15:5:

I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.

As I meditated on this verse, I realized that I often focus on bearing fruit–working for God’s kingdom, making a difference in the world. But if I’m trying hard to produce fruit on my own, it won’t work. Jesus tells me, “Apart from me you can do nothing.” I’m trying to squeeze out some awesome grapes (aka “amazing accomplishments”), but I end up exhausted and frustrated.

3 WaysAbiding in ChristCan Change Your Life


Then I recognized the fact that bearing fruit is not really my job. My role is to simply abide in Christ. And if I abide, fruit comes naturally.

Think about it. What if the branch said to the vine, “I’m working really hard right now to produce some fantastic grapes. All I need to do is read some more books on horticulture and get up before the sun and work till dark. It will be exhausting, but worth it. Vine, I don’t really need you, I just need to put in a little more effort.”

But the vine says, “It’s useless to try to produce fruit without Me. If you are not connected to me, you will not receive the water and nutrients that are necessary for growth and fruit. All you really need to do is stay connected to me. I will give you everything you need to produce amazing fruit if you just abide in me.”

So what does it mean to abide in Christ? We will explore that a little deeper in the upcoming posts, but to put it simply–to abide in Christ is to connect to Jesus. To keep my eyes on Him, trust Him for everything, and to rely on Him instead of my own abilities. It is to obey God’s commands because they are the instruction book for a fruitful and meaningful life. It is to sink my roots deep into His unconditional love and trust that what the Father wills is best.

This focus on abiding changed my life because it changed my attention from:

“How can I produce more?” or “How can I accomplish more?”

to:

“How can I connect to Jesus today?” and “How can I draw on His strength right now?

I shift my focus from what I can produce to what Jesus can accomplish. I turn my attention from doing to resting in His love.

So if you are exhausted by trying to squeeze out fruit–produce something impressive, accomplish something big–remember that’s not your job. Your role is to abide in the vine–Jesus–and then the fruit will come naturally.

Next step: Ask God to show you if you have been focusing more on producing or more on abiding. Write a prayer asking Him to help you learn to abide.

Check out my other posts on abiding in Christ: Keeping and Remaining.

Five Checkpoints for a Quality Day

5 Checkpoints for a Quality Day

I love resale shops. Some of my favorite clothes are from thrift-shops and resale boutiques. Often I find exactly the right color and fit in one of these stores, even when a hunt in typical retail shops turns up nothing.

However, resale shopping requires a keen eye for quality. Many of the clothes are wonderful buys, but there are also a lot of garments with stains, torn seams, and pilled fabrics. Sometimes I get so excited about a fashionable find that I forget to check all the details. Later, when I am about to wear the new sweater or skirt, I discover a flaw that makes it unusable. To help you avoid my mistakes, I offer this list.

Five Checkpoints of a Quality Garment

1. Is the garment clean, without stains?

2. Is the fabric in good shape? Or is faded, worn, or pilly?

3. Is the stitching tight and secure?

4. Are the buttons reinforced?

5. Does the garment have a wide, even hem?

The lessons from quality garments can apply to our lives as well. Often, I live life without paying attention to the details. I rush from appointment to appointment without the considering how to better spend my time.

The philosopher Plato wrote:

The unexamined life is not worth living.

So how should we examine our lives? What elements create a day well spent?

5 Checkpoints of a QualityDay

Drawing from the checkpoints of a quality garment, here are some features to look for in a day well spent:

Five Checkpoints of a Quality Day

1. Was the day cleaned? Did it include a time of confession and receiving God’s forgiveness?

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10 NIV).

2. Were joy and laughter included in the fabric of the day?

The joy of the Lord is your strength.” (Nehemiah 8:10 NIV)

3. Was the day stitched with love?

Do everything in love.” (1 Corinthians 16:14 NIV)

4. Was the day reinforced with God’s Word?

“Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.” (Psalm 119:105)

5. Was the day hemmed in prayer and thankfulness?

“By day the LORD directs his love, at night his song is with me— a prayer to the God of my life.” (Psalm 42:8)
I pray that God will bless your days with love and laughter, with His grace and guidance. May you count your blessings and enjoy His fellowship!
Next step: Print up the checkpoints of a quality day and keep them by your bed. Do a quick check at the end of each day!

Four Steps to a Less Frazzled Life

layered look works in fashion but not in life

I love window shopping. Wandering through boutiques and shops, scoping out new styles and fashions is one of my favorite pastimes. I pause at store windows, looking at the mannequins dressed in the latest trends. I check out the fabrics, colors and cut of the clothes.

Inevitably, one particular outfit will catch my eye. And often what I like about the ensemble is the play of different textures and hues. Then I will look a little closer and realize that the mannequin is dressed in 87 tops!

Okay, I might be exaggerating.

But an example of a showcased outfit might be a camisole, t-shirt, a button-down shirt, and sweater. Three or four necklaces and a scarf complete the ensemble.

Too much!

I don’t dress like that, but sometimes I try to layer too much into my life. I pile on one activity after another. I direct the church choir, lead a ladies’ Bible study and volunteer. I try to keep up with the dusting, vacuuming and toilet-bowl swishing. In between I have lunch with friends, talk to my mom on the phone and try to spend time with my family.

Although the layering of fashions looks stylish on the boutique mannequin, the layering of activities usually leaves me looking frazzled.

Four Steps to a Less Frazzled Life

In her book, Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World, author Joanna Weaver talks about how Mary found “the one thing needed”–intimacy with Jesus. When Jesus was visiting Mary and her sister Martha, Martha bustled around the kitchen, while Mary sat at the feet of Jesus. And Jesus said,

“Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. (Luke 10: 41-42)

When we try to do too many things, the one important thing often gets neglected.

Joanna Weaver offers some practical advice on how to practice “one-thing living.” She outlines four helpful steps:

1. Invite Jesus to rule and reign. Each morning ask Jesus to rule your day.
2. Ask God to reveal the next step. As you go through the day ask God to reveal the next thing you need to do. Don’t try to do it all at once.
3. Have faith that what needs to get done will get done. Trust God to show you each item that needs to be accomplished and trust that what didn’t get done can wait or will be done by someone else.
4. Be open to the Spirit’s leading. Our days may be interrupted by divine appointments.

Let’s try “one-thing living” this week. Jesus invites us to sit at His feet for a time. He offers to take all of our anxieties and frantic activity and if we will let Him. Take time from all you frazzled hustle and enjoy intimacy with the Savior.

Next step: Start your morning by inviting Jesus to rule your day. Pray over your calendar and ask Him what is the next thing you need to do. Accept His grace to complete the task.

4 Steps to Finding Your True Self

-Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you-- Luke 9-25 The Message

Have you lost the real you?

Frederick Buechner wrote in his book Telling Secrets:

We try to make ourselves into something that we hope the world will like better than it apparently did the selves we originally were. That is the story of all our lives, needless to say, and in the process of living out that story, the original, shimmering self gets buried so deep that most of us end up hardly living our of it at all. Instead, we live out all the other selves which we are constantly putting on and taking off like coats and hats against the world’s weather.

Do you find this to be true in your life as well?

Sometimes I find myself putting on a “coat and hat” in order to feel good about myself, and later a totally different set of clothes when the first set didn’t work. I keep trying on different outfits, none of them fitting exactly right. I begin to lose the real me. I cover up the “original, shimmering self” that God made me to be.

4 Steps to Finding Your

Ironically, Jesus tells me that the way to finding my true self is not to add new clothes to my life but to give my “self” away.

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself?  Luke 9:24-25

When we try to protect ourselves from difficulty, we may lose our true lives. When we try to fit into the world–acting as someone it would like a little better–I forfeit myself.

It seems counter-intuitive, but the best way to find my true self is to sacrifice my rights to myself. To lay my life in God’s hands so He can restore the shimmering self, the person I was meant to be.

Of course, this is easier said than done. My sinful self is always arguing with my authentic self that this will be too difficult, too scary, too painful. And truthfully, sacrificing my rights to myself is almost always challenging and agonizing. But when I have been able to quiet the sinful self and lay my life with its hopes and dreams in God’s hands, He has led me to joy, hope, and self-discovery.

So how can you find your authentic self?

  1. Ask God for wisdom. Pray to our loving Father, asking Him to show you if you’ve been wearing a self that you hope the world likes better than the real you.
  2. If you realize you’ve been wearing a “coat and hat” to please other people, ask the Holy Spirit to help you lay it down.
  3. Receive God’s grace and forgiveness.
  4. Place your life in God’s hands and realize He loves you just as you are.

Let’s abandon the “other selves” we are tempted to wear and shut out the arguments of our sinful self in order to find the “original, shimmering self” that God intended each of us to be.

Next step: Follow the steps above. Write out a prayer to the Father, thanking Him for His grace, love, and acceptance.

The Surprising Gift of Saying Yes

20170614_fritz_sayingyes_1024Brenda and I met in the lounge of a transitional home for women where she and thirty other women were working to rebuild their shattered lives. Amongst mismatched sofas and coffee tables that had seen better days, I helped this sixty-two-year-old woman prepare for her GED exam.

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I volunteered to tutor Brenda. Would we hit it off? Become friends? Or would the relationship remain that of tutor and student?

Truth be told, Brenda and I had very little in common. She is African-American. I am the palest of white you can imagine. She was raised in the South. I grew up in the tundra-country of Wisconsin. Brenda had many years of hard living on the streets. I live in relative comfort.

But none of that mattered when we got together. Read on at (in)courage.

3 Reasons Brokenness Can Lead to Joy

Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me— now let me rejoice.

When my children were very young we lived in the parsonage next to the church. I taught piano lessons in the afternoon and took my kids to a neighborhood babysitter before my students came. One day I was running a little late. I picked up my toddler, grabbed the diaper bag, and told my 4-year-old to hurry up. I rushed out the door and locked it behind me before realized I had left my keys in the house. Ordinarily, this would not have been a big problem because I could have just walked over to the church next door and gotten a set of keys from my pastor husband. But that particular day he was at a pastors’ conference an hour’s drive away.

My mind clicked through my options.

Option 1: Go to a neighbor’s house and call a locksmith. (Much too slow and expensive.)

Option 2: Break the small window in the door and unlock the lock. (Much faster and probably less expensive than the locksmith.)

So I grabbed a big rock and took my daughter’s doll blanket from her. I wrapped the blanket around the rock and my hand and smashed the window. Now I could unlock the door, grab the keys, take the kids to the babysitter and get back before my students came.

It all worked out very well—except for the fact that when my husband came home later that day he thought a robber had broken in!

And I had to admit that I was the one who had broken the window.

But I had to break the window in order to unlock the door.

I find this is true in my emotional life as well. Sometimes God uses painful experiences to break into my life. Sometimes it takes a disappointment or a sorrow for God to get my attention. I don’t enjoy the painful periods in my life, but sometimes it is as if those experiences break through the stuff of the world and help me feel God’s presence more clearly.

God Breaks Through 

King David experienced brokenness. The prophet Nathan confronted the king with his sin and David responded with repentance. His pride was broken. After he confessed his sin, he asked God to restore his joy:

Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me— now let me rejoice. Psalm 51:8

I, too, have experienced this brokenness. And this joy. When I realize my sin, I feel the burden of my mistake. But when I confess, God gives grace. My heavy spirit is once again free to enjoy the forgiveness and freedom of mercy.

But we are not always broken because of sin. Sometimes we are crushed by thoughtless comments of others. Our lives are shattered by tragedy. Our spirits are fragmented by grief. We don’t know if we will ever find joy again.

That’s when we need to remember that brokenness can be the beginning of joy–God’s incomprehensible joy. Our heavenly Father can use that very brokenness to break through with His presence.

3 Reasons Brokenness Can Be the Beginning of Joy

3 Reasons Brokenness Can Lead to Joy

Brokenness can be the beginning of joy because it tears away the unimportant. Without all the clutter of life in the way, we can see God.

Brokenness can be the beginning of joy because it pushes us to our Savior. We can see Him holding out His hands to us, waiting for us to step into His embrace. We can see the mercy and love in His eyes.

Brokenness can be the beginning of joy because God’s joy isn’t limited by our situation. Jesus can transform our brokenness into joy. A joy that can’t be explained by our circumstances. A bubbling up of peace and happiness that makes no sense except in the presence of God.

Sometimes our heavenly Father uses pain to break through the myriad of distractions in our lives and unlock the door to His presence.

Sometimes joy begins in brokenness.