Sharla, Author at Sharla Fritz

Sharla May 3, 2016

7 Habits That Promote Soul Rest: One Thing

I have long suffered from the syndrome of TTDIA–Trying To Do It All.

My calendar is filled with activities. My planner is stuffed with unmet goals. I try to pack more and more into each day only to realize when it’s time to go to bed that I haven’t accomplished even half of what I set out to do.

My frenetic pace reached a climax a little over a year ago. I knew things had to change, but I didn’t know how to make the shift. I could figure out what action to take.

Then my husband was diagnosed with a disease even more serious than TTDIA. The doctors told him he had non-Hodgkins lymphoma. It was a shock for this usually healthy-as-a-horse man. Medical personnel assured us that his prognosis was good, but now our time was spent in doctor’s offices, medical test facilities, and chemotherapy labs.

Obviously, my priorities changed. Activities and goals that seemed so essential became unimportant.

But life went on (thankfully) and certain things still needed to be done. I felt restless and anxious over how I would accomplish everything.

In the midst of the chaos, God gave me a solution. Instead of Trying To Do It All, He invited me to ask Him what needed to be done.

So I began a new habit. Each day I would ask my wise Father, “What is the one thing You want me to accomplish?” I focused on completing this task as soon as possible. Then, even if nothing else got crossed off my to-do list, I had the confidence that I had finished what the Lord had asked of me.

Thankfully, my husband is now in remission. (Thank You, Lord!) But I have continued this habit. This simple morning exercise brings me daily soul rest.

TTDIA is exhausting. If you’ve ever suffered from this syndrome you know the symptoms: feelings of anxiety, fear, and dread crowd your heart.

But when we ask the Father what is truly important and fulfill His desire for our day we will find peace, sufficiency, and strength.

When we ask the Father what is truly important and fulfill His desire for our day we find soul rest. Share on X

[By the way, the habit of One Thing is also one of the habits I teach in my eCourse Distracted: 12 Faith-Focus Habits for a Frenzied World. Find out more about this course by clicking here.]

Next step: Every morning this week, ask the Father, “What is the One Thing You want me to do today?” Then whether He points you to an item on your to-do list or asks you to accomplish something you didn’t even think of, focus on that task first.

Filed Under: Spiritual Disciplines Tagged With: soul care, stress

Sharla April 19, 2016

7 Habits That Promote Soul Rest: Gratitude

A few years ago I was part of women’s Bible study group in another church. As part of the study book we were doing, we were all encouraged to keep a gratitude journal. Every day for a week we were instructed to write down at least three things we were thankful for.

One of the women in the group was skeptical on how this exercise was going to help. She was going through a difficult time in life. Financial problems. Work problems. Family problems. How was writing down three things on a piece of paper going to help her?

But the next week she came back with a smile. She reported, “I can’t believe how much the gratitude journal changed my perspective on life. I didn’t think it would make any difference. But simply finding three small things to thank God for every day transformed my attitude.”

The habit of gratitude is, without a doubt, a practice that inspires soul rest.

So much of the turmoil and unrest I experience come from discontent, envy, and comparison. When I look at the fabulous career of a friend, I feel a twinge of jealousy. When I work hard, but success seems just out of reach, I complain. When friends talk about spending time with their families while my daughter lives halfway around the world in China, my happiness melts away.

But when I deliberately choose gratitude, my perspective is transformed. It’s my natural inclination to stay in the cellar of discontent and grumble. (I’ve even been known to throw a pity party down there). Often, I can’t even take the first step of gratitude on my own. I need the Holy Spirit to give me the strength to say, “Thank You.” Each thank you becomes a step on a staircase out of the cellar of discouragement and despair.

So how can we develop a habit of gratitude? Here are a few ways:

Start a gratitude journal. Buy a pretty journal or grab an empty spiral notebook. Every day write down three things that made you smile, that you’ve taken for granted, or that gave a moment of joy. Like my Bible study group, try the gratitude experiment for a week and see what a difference it can make.

Use a commonplace cue. I recently turned my frustration with stop lights into a cue for gratitude. Every time I’m forced to stop at a red light I use the time to thank God for the many blessings He gives. What everyday occurrence could you use as a signal to give thanks? Walking through your front door? Pouring a cup of coffee?

Make the decision to be grateful. When you find yourself in the cellar of discontent–don’t stay there! Immediately make the decision to get out through the stairway of gratitude. When my friend talks about her fabulous career, I can thank God for the writing work He has given me. When I hear about families spending holidays together, I can be grateful that my family is close at heart if not in miles.

Psalm 100:4 says:

Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name!

Thanksgiving leads us into God’s presence. And in His presence, we find soul rest.

Thanksgiving leads us into God's presence. And in His presence, we find soul rest. Share on X

Next step: Choose one of the gratitude habits to implement this week. Perhaps use sticky notes in strategic places to remind you to write in a gratitude journal, use commonplace cues, or to make the decision to be grateful.

Filed Under: Spiritual Disciplines Tagged With: gratitude

Sharla April 12, 2016

7 Habits That Promote Soul Rest: Daily Meeting with God

My dad loved meetings.

And that was a good thing because he needed to attend a lot of them. After retiring from his job as a radio station sales manager, he ran for city council and won. In the city he lived in, it wasn’t a full-time job, but it involved a lot of council meetings, board meetings, and committee meetings. And he loved attending them all because they connected him with people.

I don’t always appreciate meetings. But there is one meeting time I always try to keep: my daily appointment with the Lord.

People use a variety of terms for this kind of meeting: Quiet Time. Daily Devotions. Personal Bible Study.

Whatever you call this time with God–keeping this daily appointment is the number one habit for soul rest.

Why? Because soul rest is only available from Jesus. In Matthew 11:28 He invites us:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Now you may say, “But Sharla, I’ve had a quiet time for years and I don’t think it has helped me experience soul rest.”

To which I would say, “I can totally relate.”

For years, I faithfully opened my Bible and had a devotional time in the morning. I love God’s Word so it didn’t seem like a chore. But I often viewed it as something to check off on my to-do list for the day. It was not so much a time for meeting with God as it was an intellectual exercise.

You see, I was looking at my meeting time with God like I viewed other meetings. A time to get something accomplished. (Which is why I don’t like meetings: often there is lots of discussion but not much action.) I needed to view meeting with God like my dad viewed meetings: a time to connect.

We can view our time with God as a duty to be checked off. We can look at it as a time to accomplish something: Read three chapters of the Bible. Memorize a passage. Finish the lesson for Wednesday night’s small group.

But that won’t give us the soul rest we so desperately need.

Instead, view your meeting with God as a time to connect with Him. Keep your daily appointment with Jesus knowing He promises to give you rest. Come weary–receive strength. Come disappointed–receive hope. Come distracted and anxiety ridden–receive peace

The number one habit that promotes soul rest is a daily meeting time with God. But only if we view time with Jesus as a time to relax in His care. A time to experience His peace. A time to receive His love.

Your daily appointment with God is a time to relax in His care, experience His peace, and receive His love. Share on X

Next step: if you don’t already have a daily appointment with God, start one now. (Check out this post on making quiet time a habit.) If you already have the habit of a daily quiet time, add the habit of viewing it as a time to connect with Jesus and receive His rest. Write Matthew 11:28 on a card and post it where you have your quiet time or keep it in your Bible.

For more ideas on soul care, check out my free resource–Soul Spa Kit: 59 Ideas for Creating Your Own Spiritual Retreat. Just sign up for my newsletter in the form below!

Filed Under: Spiritual Disciplines Tagged With: quiet time

Sharla April 5, 2016

7 Habits That Promote Soul Rest

I started a new habit this week: brushing my teeth while standing on one leg.

It looks silly, but the idea is to improve my balance. I heard about this practice from the book Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives, by Gretchen Rubin. Rubin is one of my favorite secular authors and I found this book fascinating. Her premise is that habits make our lives better, because once they are in place we don’t have to think about them. For instance, my overall health is better because I exercise every weekday. I don’t struggle with the decision if I should exercise or not. I just do it. (Huh. That would make a good slogan.)

While I was reading the book, I got to wondering if habits could improve my spiritual life as well. Are there things that I could do every day that would improve my relationship with God?

This idea is not new. God, in fact, instituted a few habits for His people in the Old Testament.

Every year, they were to practice the ritual of Passover–remembering God’s mighty act of bringing them out of Egypt.

Every week the Israelites were to celebrate the Sabbath–ceasing their work and instead spending time worshipping God.

Every day they were to call upon God–“Every day I call upon you, O Lord, I spread out my hands to you” (Psalm 88:9).

These habits were all designed to draw the Israelites out of their normal routine and into God’s presence.

God told Moses:

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest. (Exodus 33:14)

Ah rest, that is what I need. Soul rest. The kind of rest that would calm my heart. The kind of respite that would obliterate the restlessness in my spirit.The kind of stillness that would cancel out the craziness of this world like noise-cancelling headphones wipe out the pandemonium around me.

So what habits and routines promote soul rest? It seems from Exodus 33:14 that the answer is: any routine that draws us into the presence of the Lord.

Over the next few weeks, I will explore a few spiritual habits that will help find that rest. Some will be routines you probably already have in place, like a daily quiet time. But some may be new to you, like prayer journaling. Each habit will have one purpose in mind–to connect with Jesus.

And I promise I won’t urge you to brush your teeth while standing on one leg.

Check out all seven habits! Click the links below.

#1 Daily Meeting With God

#7 Personal Spiritual Retreat

Next step: Choose one of the 7 Habits that sounds intriguing. Practice it for 21 days to make it a habit. Accept God’s invitation to rest.

Filed Under: Spiritual Disciplines Tagged With: rest, soul care

Sharla March 29, 2016

Three Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was Waiting

Are you sitting in one of life’s waiting rooms?

Waiting for Mr. Right? For a child? For a new job?

I’ve been there too. And I have to admit, I didn’t wait well.

I complained. I griped. I made sure God knew that I didn’t like the way things were going.

But I’ve been learning a bit about waiting lately. And what I’ve discovered is that although we may hate waiting–God can use the pause in our plans for our good.

This past week I read Psalm 130. I love these verses:

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
    and in his word I hope;
my soul waits for the Lord
    more than watchmen for the morning,
    more than watchmen for the morning. (verses 5-6)

To dig into this passage a little deeper, I looked up the word wait in the Hebrew dictionary. The word translated “wait” in the ESV is from the Hebrew word qavah. This Hebrew word has several meanings–and teaches three things about waiting that I wish I had known when I was in experiencing a serious delay in my plans.

Three Lessons About Waiting from the Hebrew Word Qavah

To wait is to look eagerly for. The first meaning for qavah emphasizes how we are to wait–with eagerness and certainty. In verse 6 of Psalm 130 the psalmist compares the waiting of his soul to the waiting of the night watchman. The gloom of the night may seem long to the watchman, but he is sure of one thing–morning will come. While he is watching, he is certain there is an end to the wait.

Though our lives may seem terribly black at times, we can also be sure that God is always there for us. He is always working things out for our good. We can eagerly look for His solution to our problems.

To wait is to linger. The second meaning stresses a positive side of waiting. Usually waiting has a negative connotation. We hate waiting at the checkout line. Or for our food at Olive Garden. Or for someone to answer the phone after we’ve been on hold for 20 minutes!

But to linger is a contented way to wait. We linger over the last few drops of coffee with a friend–waiting just a few more minutes before we have to part. We linger in the sunshine at the beach–waiting a moment longer before going back to the noise of the world.

God invites us to view a season of waiting as a time to linger in His presence. Time to hang out with Him a few more hours. Time to linger in His love and peace.

God invites us to view a season of waiting as a time to linger in His presence. Share on X

To wait is to collect or bind together. The third definition of the Hebrew word is a meaning we don’t have for our English word wait. Qavah can mean “to bind together.” Waiting is hard. But it can be a time to grow closer to God–a time to connect with Him like never before. Think about it. When do you feel closest to God? When all your plans are moving along smoothly? Or when you are desperately wanting God to answer your prayers?

I have to admit–I spend a lot more time on my knees when life throws me a crisis and God isn’t fixing it as quickly as I would like. As I wait, God often reveals Himself to me in a way I haven’t experienced before. He shows me deep truths in His Word. He demonstrates His unfailing love in unexpected ways.

Are you experiencing a serious pause in your plans? Grab onto these three lessons while you’re waiting.

Look eagerly for God in your situation–expect Him to come through.

Linger in His presence.

Use the time of delay to grow closer to God.

Next step: Write out Psalm 130:5-6 on a note card or sticky note. Add the definition of qavah that speaks to you today. Post the note where you will see it often this week.

Filed Under: Waiting on God Tagged With: trust, wait

Sharla March 24, 2016

Maundy Thursday: The Dark Before the Dawn

Easter is almost here.

But before we get to the joyful celebration of Resurrection Sunday, we need to go through the darkness of Maundy Thursday and Good Friday.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible tells us what Jesus talked about to His disciples on the night before He went to the cross. John’s Gospel uses five of its twenty-one chapters to give us a seat at the table with the other disciples. We see Jesus washing His follower’s feet, sharing a meal with them, giving them last minute instructions, and praying for them.

John tells us that Jesus “showed them the full extent of His love” when He washed their feet (John 13:1). He lets us know that Jesus was “troubled in spirit” (John 13:21). We see Jesus’ heart for all of His disciples when He lifts His eyes to heaven and prays for us even as He is preparing for the most difficult mission of His life.

Jesus told the disciples:

I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy.A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world. So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. (John 13:20-22).

The world looked incredibly dark to the disciples on Good Friday. Their beloved Friend had died. They didn’t understand.

But the time of rejoicing was coming.

Much of life is like that too. We have grief, sorrow, sadness. Problems multiply. We experience pain, anguish. We don’t understand what is happening.

But Jesus promises us that a better time is coming. In the end we will see Him and rejoice. And even now in the dark time we can feel “the full extent of His love” (John 13:21). We can experience His peace. We can look forward to joy.

So hang on:

“Your grief will turn to joy.”

Next Step: Thank God for “the full extent of His love” that He demonstrated on Maundy Thursday and Good Friday

Filed Under: God's Relentless Love Tagged With: Lent

Sharla March 22, 2016

The Key to Unlock the Chains of “Doing”

“What did you do today?”

It’s an innocent question. One I usually like to answer. One I often use to get a conversation going.

It’s even a question I often ask myself.

I’m a doer. You too? We doers like to accomplish things. We make massive to-do lists and find glee in placing little check marks next to completed jobs. (Sometimes we even write down tasks we’ve finished that weren’t on the list just so we can make that satisfying check mark.)

But this week while I was reading and meditating on the psalms, God spoke to me about all my “doing.”

I was reading Psalm 118:5:

In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and he answered by setting me free.

And the Holy Spirit highlighted the phrase “setting me free.” The phrase unsettled my soul. But I couldn’t figure out why.

The phrase conjured up images of chains falling off swollen wrists. Of bursting out of a dark dungeon into blinding sunshine. Of running through a swaying field of flowers.

I asked God why my heart needed to hear that particular phrase.

And the answer was that I have been bound to the chains of “doing.” Being a doer is not a bad thing. But it can get in the way of being a child of God if I am basing my value on my accomplishments. If I’m focusing on what I can do. If I view myself as worthless when my efforts don’t get the results I would like.

In that simple little phrase, “setting me free,” the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart: What if instead of focusing on what you have done, instead of staring at what you haven’t done (ahem where I’ve failed), you began to concentrate on what God has done?

Later in Psalm 118 there is another phrase that grabbed my heart: “proclaim what the Lord has done” (verse 17).

In fact, Psalm 118 is full of things the Lord has done: He has

loved me forever (verse 1)
set me free (verse 5)
helped me (verse 7)
protected me (verse 8)
done mighty things (verse 16)

And when I look back on the past few weeks of my life, I see that He has:

given my husband a good health report–no cancer!
helped me recover from a bad cold
given me time with my daughter and her family
granted me a new book contract

When I focus on “what the Lord has done” the chains of doing and the pressure of accomplishing fall away.

I am set free.

Next step: What has the Lord done for you this week? Make a list. And as you focus on what God has done, feel the pressure of accomplishment fall away.

Filed Under: Spiritual Growth Tagged With: doing, rest, trust

Sharla March 15, 2016

One Selfish Reason to Praise God

I woke too early. My body was still tired, but my internal clock was still on Central Time even though I was in Hawaii. We had arrived the night before, tired from travel, and flopped into bed.

But now I was wide awake. I made my way to the windows and pushed open the curtains. I gasped at the beauty of the sun just peeking out of the gray Pacific. The sky was a spectacular painting of pink, purple, and mauve.

My heart swelled in praise and I couldn’t help singing “10,000 Reasons.” The sun was coming up. A new day was dawning. It was time to praise the Creator.

Sometimes it’s easy to praise God. The beauty of creation inspires thanksgiving. God sends overflowing blessings into our lives and we are grateful. We recognize His power in our lives and we are in awe.

But sometimes praise doesn’t come easy. Life is difficult. Problems sprout like weeds. Instead of having “10,000 Reasons” to praise, we struggle to come up with one.

That’s when we need to remember to praise God for who He is and not simply for what He gives us.

Psalm 95 gives three reasons to praise God:

Because He is the God above all gods. We praise Him for His Kingship. We praise Him for His ruling power.

For the Lord is a great God, and a great King above all gods. (Psalm 95:3)

Because everything on earth was made by Him and belongs to Him. We praise Him for His omnipotence and creative power.

In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also. The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land. (Psalm 95:4-5)

Because He cares for us. We praise His love, His compassion, His provision, and His protection toward us.

Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker! For he is our God, and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. (Psalm 95:6-7)

God deserves praise. And that should be enough reason to shower Him with honor and adoration.

But praise also brings a side benefit to those who are doing the praising.

In the middle of verse 7 the psalmist takes an abrupt turn from praising God to remind his readers not to harden their hearts.

Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts, as at Meribah, as on the day at Massah in the wilderness, (Psalm 95:7b-8)

We all need this reminder. At times we all stubbornly insist on our own way and steel our hearts against God’s gentle nudges. Or we get so busy and preoccupied with life’s little hassles that we don’t even hear His voice.

Matthew Henry wrote in his commentary on this psalm, “Hardness of heart is at the bottom of all our distrusts of God and quarrels with Him.”

But maybe in looking at this psalm we can see that praise can be preventative medicine to a hard heart.

We praise God for His sake, but a wonderful side-effect happens when we do. When we extol God’s mercy and power, God rewires our souls–reminding our stubborn selfish hearts just how wonderful He is.

When we extol God's mercy and power, He rewires our souls--reminding our selfish hearts how wonderful He is. Share on X

Praise keeps our hearts soft toward God as we praise Him for His goodness.

Next step: Write out your own psalm of praise. Praise God for His Kingship, for His creative power, and for His compassionate care.

Filed Under: Spiritual Growth Tagged With: praise, prayer

Sharla March 8, 2016

The One Thing Better Than Life Itself

My husband and I heard of an opportunity to take a fabulous vacation. The place sounded fascinating. We had never been there before.

But we said no.

Why? Because it wasn’t China. When we heard of the opportunity, we both looked at each other and said, “I don’t think so. The cost of that trip is worth half of a trip to China. And we’d rather save our money for China.”

Now until 2011 we had never had any desire to go to China. But when our daughter and her husband–and our grandchildren!–moved there, it suddenly became our number one vacation destination.

We soon began evaluating all of our major purchases in terms of trips to China. Because a trip to see our grandkids is better than almost anything else money can buy.

King David made a similar statement in Psalm 63:

Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. (Psalm 63:3)

I have long loved that verse, but as I have been reading through the Psalms this Lenten season, the Holy Spirit highlighted this Scripture and asked me, “Do you believe this? Do you live as if God’s love is better than life itself?”

And I had to answer no.

God’s love is incredibly important, but I often live my life as if human relationships are more important. I have made recognition for my work a greater priority. I have valued shiny new things over God’s precious love.

So I wrote a prayer of confession:

“Lord, forgive me when I have not totally believed that Your love is better than life. When I have ignored that life-giving, restoring love and searched for meaning through accomplishments. When I have made human relationship more important than ours. When I have spent more time trying to amass things than I have spent with you.

Father remind me. Remind me that Your love is

better than recognition

better than being popular

better than wealth

better than having family close

Your love is better than life.”

A trip to China is better than most anything money can buy.

But God’s unfailing love is better than life.

Next step: Write your own prayer asking God to help you live as if His love is better than life.

Filed Under: God's Relentless Love

Sharla March 1, 2016

4 Steps to Take When You’re Discouraged

Years ago a friend came to our house broken and discouraged. His heart was more than bruised. It had been stomped on, kicked in, and used as a punching bag.

His wife had just asked for a divorce.

My husband is a pastor and this man was not only a friend, but a member of our congregation. He came to my husband for counseling. For support.

That first night all we did was hug him. Cry with him.Sit in shock with him.

He came often to talk with my husband, but one day he arrived when my husband wasn’t home yet. This twenty-something man shuffled in like a person sixty years older. Shoulders slumped, he made his way to the sofa, but didn’t even make it to the seat. Instead he slid down to the floor in a ball of tears and desperation.

My kids were running around the house and I wasn’t sure what to do. So I just slumped down on the floor, leaning against a nearby chair, and sat with him.

As his sadness permeated the room and my own soul, I remembered Psalm 42–the place I always go when my heart is shattered. While we sat on the floor I shared how this psalm encourages me when I’m in a pit of discouragement.

Acknowledge the Feelings

King David must have been in a broken state when he wrote the words:

Why am I discouraged?
Why is my heart so sad? (Psalm 42:5a)

I love how David talks to his soul. He takes the first step and acknowledges the sadness, the depression, the emptiness.

The first step I take is to recognize all the pain in my heart. I name the emotions no matter how ugly.

Look Toward God

But David doesn’t let his heart stay in that desperate place. He immediately encourages his soul:

I will put my hope in God!
I will praise him again—
my Savior and my God! (Psalm 42:5b)

The second step to take when I’m heartbroken and discouraged is to stop looking at the problem and remind my heart to look toward God.

After I acknowledge my discouragement I need to turn to the Source of hope.

Remember God’s Help in the Past

Next I need to remember how God has brought me through all my other deep and desperate places. David wrote:

Now I am deeply discouraged,
but I will remember you—
even from distant Mount Hermon, the source of the Jordan,
from the land of Mount Mizar. (Psalm 42:6)

I need to recall how the Lord has guided me through my valleys and back to the mountaintop. He has brought me through sadness and depression before. He will do it again.

Turn Times of Discouragement Into Times of Intimacy with God.

Finally, I need to realize that times of discouragement can be a time of intimacy with God.

David wrote:

As the deer longs for streams of water,
song for you, O God. Psalm 42:1

When the world stomps on my heart there is Someone who can mend it. and satisfy my soul. When I face deserts of disappointment, I need to realize that God is the only One who can truly quench my thirst and satisfy my soul.

When I face deserts of disappointment, I realize God is the only One who can truly quench my thirst. Share on X

I’m not sure my words of encouragement helped my friend going through a divorce more than just sitting with him.

But Psalm 42 is the place I go when discouragement and disappointment visit my life.

Psalm 42 is the first psalm in Book II which includes Psalms 42-75. This book of psalms is sometimes called the “Elohim Psalter Part 1” because Elohim is the name for God used most often. Elohim is the Hebrew name for God that is used in the very first sentence of the Bible. So the name Elohim reminds us that He is the Creator, the One who began it all. Many of the psalms in Book II are written by David, but some are written by the sons of Korah– Levites that David put in charge of music at the tabernacle.

Next step: Are you brokenhearted or discouraged? Which of the four steps do you need to take today? Acknowledging your feeling? Looking away from the problem and toward God? Remember God’s help in the past? Realizing this time of disappointment may lead to greater intimacy with God? Journal your response.

Filed Under: Spiritual Growth, Taming Your Tongue Tagged With: encouragement