What does it mean to listen to your life?
At the beginning of 2022, I chose the word “listen” to guide my year. (You can find out more about choosing a word for your year here.) During this year I have tried to become a better listener, both in listening to God and listening to the people in my life. I have endeavored to learn more about listening by looking for passages in the Bible about listening and memorizing a few key verses.
I have also read a few books about listening, including, Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation. I think one of the questions we all ask God is, “What do You want me to do with my life?” We wrestle with this question when we don the graduation gown and wonder what major to declare in college. We repeat the question when the job we have doesn’t seem the right fit. The question inserts itself into our middle years when we wonder what to do with an empty nest. We ask, “Now what, God?”
Let Your Life Speak tells us that God may speak through our very lives. As we reflect on what’s happening right now and interpret it through the lens of God’s Word, we may find clues about our next steps.
Here are three lessons I gleaned from the book and how I’ve been using these principles.
Principle 1: Listen to Your Life by Reflecting On What is Happening
Author Parker Palmer writes,
“We need to listen to what our lives are saying and take notes on it, lest we forget our own truth or deny that we ever heard it” (p.6).
This sounds very mysterious, right Listen to what our lives are saying?
Acts 17:26-27 can give us some guidance here:
And he made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, that they should seek God, and perhaps feel their way toward him and find him. Yet he is actually not far from each one of us. (ESV)
In other words, God can use our specific time and place to draw us closer to Him. He can use the good and the bad, the joyful and the painful. He can use the unexpected diagnosis to pull us into His arms. Guidance can come through a job promotion.One of the ways I use this principle is to ask reflection questions. At least one a month I take a few hours to look back and discover mor about my life.
I ask questions like:
- What in the past 30 days was life-giving?
- What was life-draining?
- What drew me closer to God?
- What led me away from Him?
In answering these questions, I can more clearly see what activities I want to continue and what I need to abandon. Perhaps I discover that too much time on social media is life-draining and so I take steps to limit my time there. On the other hand, I may find that my time teaching ESL at a local literacy center is incredibly life-giving and so I choose to continue it. Of course, we can’t always chuck the life-draining activities. A newborn still needs 2 am feedings. We can’t simply ditch our nagging back pain. But reflecting on our lives can give us clues on what steps to take next in our journey with God.
Principle #2: Listen to Your Life by Knowing Yourself Better
When I look for direction in life, I would like to find a plan with all the steps that would guarantee success and meaningful purpose. But the truth is, no plan can work for everyone because each person is unique. To know what steps to take, we need to know ourselves.
Palmer writes,
One dwells with God by being faithful to one’s nature. One crosses God by trying to be something one is not. (p. 51)
And:
It is the self planted in us by the God who made us in God’s own image–the self that wants nothing more, or less, than for us to be who we were created to be. (p. 69)
When I’m listening to God for life direction, I take into account how God made me. The more I know about myself, the more I have the ability to choose the life path best suited for me. I can better understand my God-given talents and why certain jobs or ways of serving feel right and others don’t. I can listen to my life in order to answer the question, “When do I most feel like me?”
In the past few years, I have used a few different personality tests that have enabled me to know myself better. You might want to check out some of them too.
Clifton Strengths: This assessment helps you discover what you naturally do best and how to develop your greatest talents into strengths.
Myers-Briggs: This well-known personality theory purports that much of our behavior that appears random actually is consistent according to the way we all prefer to use our perception and judgment. The actual Myers-Briggs test requires a fee. But here’s a site where you can take a similar test for free.
Enneagram: The Enneagram is an ancient personality typing system which can help you understand how you are wired and strengthen your relationship with God. Some of the helpful books I’ve read on the Enneagram include The Road Back to You, The Sacred Enneagram, and The Essential Enneagram.
Tendency: One of my favorite secular authors, Gretchen Rubin, has developed a system of how people respond to expectations called the Four Tendencies. Finding your tendency can help you understand why you might have trouble meeting deadlines or completing your own goals. This information will aid you in finding strategies to improve. You can take a quiz to find your tendency.
You can listen to your life by embracing how God has made you and not wishing that He had crafted you differently. In His infinite love and wisdom, He created you in a very particular way to serve with unique gifts and capabilities.
Principle #3: Listen to Your Life by Knowing Your Identity
In addition to listening to our lives to find out exactly who we are and where our unique gifts fit into the world, we need to remember to whom we belong.
Palmer writes,
The ancient human question, “Who am I?” leads inevitably to the equally important question “Whose am I?”–for there is no selfhood outside of relationship. (p. 17)
For those who believe in Jesus, the answer to “Whose am I?” is: God’s You belong to God.
The prophet Isaiah reminds us of this:
Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are Mine. (Isaiah 43:1 ESV)
Why is this important? God continually whispers: I formed you with purpose. I redeemed you because I love you. I called you by name because I want a personal relationship with you.
But if we don’t tune our ears to our Father’s voice whispering, “You are mine,” we will be more likely to listen to the other voices in our heads that say: You aren’t good enough. You can never measure up.
When we listen to God’s voice and remember to whom we belong, we are less likely to get stuck on the treadmill of activity trying to get ahead of others. We can do the work God has given us, secure in His love.
Listen
Listen to your life: What is life-giving? What is life draining?
Listen to who you are: Consider taking a personality test or two to discover more about how God put you together. Embrace how God created you instead of wishing to be someone else.
Listen to whose you are: Listen to God who whispers, “You are Mine.” Turn down the volume of the voices that say you don’t belong. Rest in your identity as God’s beloved.